Once you finalized your divorce with your spouse, you may have thought things were off to a good start. You have a court order in place that includes specific terms for child custody and child support. The only problem is that you’ve noticed a sudden and drastic change in your child’s attitude toward you, and you suspect your ex may be the driving force behind it. Critically, parental alienation can be a serious post-divorce complication, harming both your child’s development and your relationship with them. If you’ve been subjected to parental alienation, it’s vital to understand your rights and legal options.

Key Takeaways

• Parental alienation is a form of emotional abuse where one parent uses manipulation tactics in an attempt to turn the child away from the targeted parent.
• Parental alienation can cause loyalty conflicts, behavioral issues, academic issues, and long-term harm to a child’s mental health that impacts them in adulthood.
• A knowledgeable family law attorney can advise you regarding your legal rights and remedies if you’ve been subjected to parental alienation, which can include filing for contempt of court or requesting a modification of the custody order.

Common Signs of Parental Alienation

Parental alienation is a form of emotional abuse in which a parent uses manipulation tactics to turn the child away from the other parent. An alienating parent may consistently badmouth the other, interfere with the custody arrangement, and negatively influence the child’s feelings toward the targeted parent. It involves behaviors that are meant to isolate the child from the other parent, including making disparaging remarks about them in front of the child or consistently canceling the other parent’s parenting time. An alienating parent may also fabricate false narratives by telling a child that their other parent does not love them or will abandon them.

While there can be many different alienation tactics used, some common signs of parental alienation in children can include the following:

• Behavioral or academic issues
• Refusing to visit the targeted parent
• Parroting the alienating parent’s language
• Mimicking the alienating parent’s behavior
• Seeing one parent as “all bad” and the other as “all good”
• Rejecting the targeted parent’s entire family
• Acting as the “protector” of the targeted parent
• Suddenly exhibiting fear, hatred, or hostility toward the targeted parent
• Blaming themselves for the divorce

Not only does parental alienation cause a child to have loyalty conflicts, emotional turmoil, and cognitive distortion, but it can also have long-term effects on a child’s mental health. Children who learn to distrust their own perceptions and feelings may have difficulties forming healthy relationships in adulthood. They may also experience a higher rate of depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. Often, parental alienation results in an intergenerational transmission of trauma, later leading them to become alienated from their own children.

What Can You Do if You’ve Been Subjected to Parental Alienation?

In addition to interfering with your custody rights, parental alienation can profoundly harm your child’s development. It’s essential to act immediately if you are the targeted parent to protect your child and your relationship with them. Start by documenting each incident. Keep detailed notes about changes in your child’s behavior, any interference with parenting time or plans, hostile texts, and remarks made by the other parent. Save all records of communication with the other parent and take screenshots of any social media activity that may indicate alienation.

Share the evidence of manipulation you’ve collected with a knowledgeable family law attorney who has a deep understanding of parental alienation. They can best advise you regarding your legal remedies based on your specific circumstances. Your options might include filing for contempt of court based on the other parent’s interference with the existing custody order or seeking a modification of the custody order. You might even be able to obtain sole custody if you can prove that severe parental alienation occurred, since it is viewed by courts as a form of emotional abuse.

Notably, you should not attempt to retaliate against the other parent, as this could be used against you in your custody case. If a considerable amount of harm has been done, you may consider asking the court to order reunification therapy to help repair your relationship with your child. This is a child-focused therapeutic process that is designed to help reverse the effects of one parent influencing the child to reject the other.

Contact an Experienced New York Family Law Attorney

Many types of emotional, physical, or psychological abuse isolate victims from outside support. If you believe your ex is preventing your child from seeing friends, relatives, or you, their safety and best interests may depend upon you taking immediate action. At Duke Law Firm, P.C., our knowledgeable family law attorneys understand the devastating impact of parental alienation. We will work to secure a solution that protects your parental rights and is in the best interests of your child. We invite you to call us at (585) 449-4987 or visit us online to schedule a consultation to learn how we can help.